
Chef Thomas
A Proper Ploughman's Board
A board of good cheddar, thick ham, proper pickle, hard-boiled eggs, and crusty bread. Not cooking so much as assembling with conviction, and one of the finest lunches the English kitchen has ever produced.
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Created by Chef Thomas
Twisted strips of puff pastry stuffed with sharp cheddar, mustard, and cayenne, baked until golden and shatteringly crisp. The kind of thing that disappears before you've poured the first drink.
The smell is what gets people. You open the oven door and the kitchen fills with it: hot butter, toasted cheese, the faint warmth of cayenne right at the back of the throat. Someone will wander in and ask what you're making. They always do.
Cheese straws belong to a particular kind of evening. Drinks before dinner. Christmas Eve, when the house is full and everyone is standing in the kitchen because that's where the warmth is. A Friday in December when you've asked people round and want something on the table the moment they arrive, still warm, still crackling. They're the thing you put out that nobody can stop eating, and the recipe is so simple it barely qualifies as one.
Good puff pastry, the all-butter sort. Mature cheddar, grated finely so it melts properly. A little English mustard powder for depth and a pinch of cayenne for heat. That's it. I wrote it down in the notebook years ago, just three words: pastry, cheese, cayenne. It didn't need more.
A recipe is a conversation, not a contract. If you want to add a scattering of finely grated Parmesan alongside the cheddar, do. If you want smoked paprika instead of cayenne, your kitchen, your rules. The principle is the same: sharp cheese, good pastry, a hot oven, and twelve minutes of attention. There are few better feelings than putting a plate of these in front of someone and watching them reach for a second before they've finished the first.
Quantity
1 sheet (roughly 320g)
thawed if frozen
Quantity
150g
finely grated
Quantity
1
beaten
Quantity
1 teaspoon
Quantity
good pinch
Quantity
to finish
Quantity
freshly ground, to taste
| Ingredient | Quantity |
|---|---|
| all-butter puff pastrythawed if frozen | 1 sheet (roughly 320g) |
| mature cheddarfinely grated | 150g |
| eggbeaten | 1 |
| English mustard powder | 1 teaspoon |
| cayenne pepper | good pinch |
| flaky sea salt | to finish |
| black pepper | freshly ground, to taste |
Set the oven to 200C/180C fan. Line two baking sheets with parchment. Unroll the pastry on a lightly floured surface. If it has been in the fridge, give it two minutes on the counter. You want it cold enough to handle but not so stiff it cracks when you roll it. Gently roll it into a rough rectangle, about the thickness of a pound coin. Don't overwork it. Puff pastry has a memory, and if you bully it, it will shrink in the oven out of spite.
Brush the pastry generously with beaten egg. Mix the grated cheddar with the mustard powder and cayenne, then scatter it evenly over one half of the pastry, pressing it in gently with your hand. Fold the bare half over the cheesy half, like closing a book. Press down lightly with the rolling pin to seal. The cheese is sandwiched inside, which means it melts into the pastry rather than burning on top.
With a sharp knife or a pizza cutter, slice the folded pastry into strips about a finger's width. Take each strip and twist it three or four times, then lay it on the lined baking sheet with enough space between each for them to spread. Press the ends down against the parchment so they don't unravel. Some will untwist slightly. This is fine. They'll still taste the same.
Brush the tops with the remaining beaten egg and scatter a little flaky salt and a grinding of black pepper over each one. Bake for twelve to fifteen minutes, until puffed and deeply golden. You'll know they're ready by the smell: buttery, savoury, slightly toasted. The cheese at the edges will have crisped into something irresistible. Let them cool on the tray for a few minutes. They firm as they cool, going from soft to shattering.
1 serving (about 18g)
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